Coloring Outside the Red Line

Coloring Outside the Red Line

my family does not have much

we get by

i walk to school with the rest of the kids that are just like me

their families don’t have much either

they get by

the house on the corner is empty

broken down

we play in there sometimes even though we’re not supposed to

some adult said it was dangerous

i wear the same clothes to school, sometimes for a whole week

my mom makes them

she doesn’t like it when i get holes in them because then she has to fix them

i have peanut butter sandwiches for lunch just about every day

sometimes i’ll be lucky and there will be jelly

but that’s a treat and i shouldn’t get my hopes up

daddy doesn’t work now

he got hurt and they fired him over a year ago

i don’t think he’ll ever get a job again

he drinks a lot

i don’t like it when he does

he gets angry and yells at mommy

mommy helps other families with their laundry and sewing and mending and stuff

she’s good with that sort of thing

i guess that’s where she gets the money for the jelly sometimes.

our family is strong

we go to church every sunday

i like praying

it makes me feel good

i like knowing that there is a greater power out there guiding us through

i walk to school with a bunch of other kids that look like me

we have to go to this school even though it’s small and there are a lot of us

i don’t know why we can’t go to the other school, too

it’s just as close, but momma says the law won’t let us

seems silly if you ask me

pop got a really good job last year

he cleans the hospital at night

momma helps the ladies in the neighborhood out with their laundry and sewing and helps them mend their clothes

she even gives me a little money sometimes

i hold onto it so i can have money when i’m older

the house on the corner is for sale

it’s not big but it sure is better than what we have now

the family that lived there before looked nicety had a little boy and a little girl about my age that wen to the other school

they moved to other neighborhood after we moved into this apartment

i think pop is saving up to buy it or something because he doesn’t let me buy any candy or anything ever

i guess that’s ok

momma makes me delicious egg sandwiches almost every day for lunch

sometimes, i get bologna

sometimes, i even get ham and cheese

i think those are my favorite

it would be nice to have an apple too, but i guess that’ll have to wait until after we get that house

daddy went to the bank today

i was afraid he’d come home drunk again after they’d kick him out

he’s gone there before and gotten money just so we can pay our rent

just so we can eat

mommy says he promises that he’ll pay it back in 6 months

i don’t think he ever does

then 6 months later he goes back there

and they give him more money

i thought for sure they’d laugh him out of there today

and that he’d come home full of whiskey and peanuts and anger

but they gave him the money again

so instead, he just came home full of whiskey and peanuts

pop went to the bank today

i think he went to ask for money for the house

momma was nervous

if he didn’t get the money we’d be stuck in this apartment forever

but pop was a good man with a good job with lots of friends and we went to church every sunday

surely, god would make sure that pop would get the money

instead, he came home with tears in his eyes and empty pockets

©2020 Michelle L. Nielsen

The Clockwork Oranging of America

The Clockwork Oranging of America

My eyes may not be pried open,

but I cannot seem to close them.

I cannot look away

anger

sadness

violence.

One video of hate leads to another of protests to another of love and another of solidarity.

One post of right wing bigotry makes way for one post of left wing naiveté.

Antifa this.

White supremacists that.

Equally full of

hate

disdain

entitlement.

Equally capable of

instigating

aggravating

a situation already wrought with

tension

vulnerability.

There is no place for truth.

There is no place for honest discord without offensive rhetoric.

So we watch

consume

pretend we understand

pretend we know what it’s like to be

suppressed

oppressed

neglected

excluded

violated

persecuted

and

murdered

every single day.

So we watch

comment

share

post.

One video that leads to another that leads to another that leads to another that leads to…

Rebellion. 

©2020 Michelle L. Nielsen

Zoom In Zoom Out

I'm proud to say this one was accepted into the upcoming collection, Trees in a Garden of Ashes being published by Local Gems Press.


Zoom In Zoom Out 
Seems like everyone has signed on
I think we can begin.
Go check your inbox
The agenda’s there within

Bob, Sharon, Roger Kim
Let’s hear about your sales
Tricia, Mark, Sarah, Tim
What’s you plan entail?

We need to talk budget
Work through all the numbers
Hash out your big ideas
To keep from going under

If you can’t see our faces
Try using gallery view
Bob, we can’t hear you
You must still be on mute

Sharon, you’re in darkness
Please turn on a light
Roger, it’s just a blue screen
Why can’t we get this right??

Tricia turn your video on
Mark, please lose the cat
Kim, your kids are naked!
Good God! Can we just chat?

No, no! Sarah, please come back!
We can see you on the bowl!
It’s only been five minutes.
Have you no self-control?

Everyone try to focus now
So we can please get started
I need you all to settle in
What? Is Tim now in his garden?

Conference calls were hard enough
Without technology
Somehow you have no idea
That what you do, we all see!

You know you’re all still working
Even though you’re in your home
We’ve got to get this meeting done
Before you all can roam.

Are you all now board?
Are all distractions gone?
Now what! Is that my door?
Ooh yes! It’s Amazon!

©2020 Michelle L. Nielsen

What Did You Do Today?

What Did You Do Today?

Same as yesterday
Same as tomorrow
Same ol’ boring stuff
Same ol’ sorrow

Watched TV
Watched the cat
Watched my waistline
Growing fat

Went outside
Wore my mask
Went a little crazy
Why do you ask?

Drank some wine
Drank some whiskey
Drank some more
Started to miss me

Cried in passion
Cried in pain
Cried out loud
Cried in the rain

Called a friend
Called a foe
Called some people
I don’t even know

What did you do today?
Same as yesterday
Same as tomorrow
Same ol’ boring stuff
Same ol’ sorrow.

©2020 Michelle L. Nielsen

Covid Haiku

In the beginning of May, I needed to get out some thoughts and feelings about Covid. Here's one way it presented itself. More to follow.

emotions muffled
while layers protect
what we can’t touch

©2020 Michelle L. Nielsen

And I thought 2019 was rough

No question, 2019 was an extremely difficult year for me personally. I started the year with a water pipe break that impacted both main floors and the basement of my house. The construction work lasted for several months, and it was not a pleasant experience in any way, shape or form. The entire process was done my the end of May, beginning of April.

Then in the middle of April, my mom fell intensely ill. It began what would be a 9 month long perilous journey that involved a massive heart attack, intubation & ventilators, multiple hospitals, a skilled living facility and innumerable ambulance rides. Ultimately, she succumbed to the illness and passed away in January of 2020.

I thought that was going to be the worst part of the year. Nope. I was very wrong.

We started with Coronovirus aka Covid-19 aka Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome Coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2)  - the first pandemic to hit the US since the flu of 1918. What followed was a nationwide and global shut down of virtually the entire economy and at least a 3 month long stay at home order.

Just as the pandemic and the "quarantine" were finally leveling out, a man was murdered by a police officer while 3 others watched and did nothing. This triggered nationwide protests and riots as well as global protests against police brutality and for equal rights and treatment for all people. As insanely awful as this all has been, it has created an environment where people (most) are finally talking about race and what racism and white privilege actually mean. It's really the first time that I'm aware of when the entire nation and world are having these important healing conversations.

And then there were the murder hornets. And bush fires in Australia. Let's not forget the impeachment trial of Trump. The UK backs out of the EU.

And, it's only June.

This blog is inspired by all of that turmoil. I've written a lot this year, and I felt it was important to start documenting it all in one spot.

So... sit back, buckle your seat belt and enjoy the ride!